Amidst a culture’s obsession with finding your core essence, your single calling, the ultimate mission that aligns your life with your “true self,” I’ll make a contrary suggestion: Ignore the idea that you have one big reason to be in this world. Stop asking, Who am I, and why am I here? Instead, ask, What can I do to fully engage with this moment? In other words, ask:

Who am I now?

Pause and reflect, take a few breaths and consider the role you are playing in your current situation. Ask this question:

“At my best in this role, what would be the most important thing I could do right now?”

Don’t ponder too long. Your first idea could be exactly what you need to do, especially if you weren’t about to do it. In fact why not, right now, go ahead and do it.

We can wait.

…

So, how’d it go?

This simple exercise works in any situation, even in the middle of a meeting or a conversation, especially if you get that tingly feeling in your gut that something isn’t right. Instead of pondering the meaning of our unpredictable, often unfathomable lives, connecting to what’s important to us right now can be comforting and sometimes enlightening.

If our little experiment just now didn’t go so well, or you struggled to find an answer, take a few more minutes to examine your role.

First find the right name. Here are a few prompts:

Who is counting on me right now, and who am I to that person? Mentor? Guardian? Trusted Advisor? Fact Checker? Shoulder to Cry On?

What do I want to accomplish before I die? If you want to write a book, are you ready to embrace your role as a Writer? Do you want to save money for your child’s education? Is that what it means to you to be a responsible Parent? Do you want to start your own business? Maybe it’s time to take yourself seriously as an Entrepreneur.

Maybe the role is temporary: Mountain Climber, Divorcee, Lecturer, Job Seeker. Is it easier focus on being your best in these roles if you know they will eventually change?

And don’t forget the two roles that serve you for your entire life. Are you paying attention to your role as a Stoker, taking action to keep your body’s fire burning? If you are interested in steering your life, the Pilot makes great plans, sets inspiring goals and is reading this article because you are interested in making your roles more powerful.

Now that you have a name, identify the key relationships: Having thought about who is counting on you, also ask, Who will help me be my best? These people are key to your ability to define what is most important at any given moment. How would they describe you when you are doing your best?Think about that, and then ask the big question again:

“At my best in this role, what would be the most important thing I could do right now?”

As you make your Week’s Plan, knowing your roles in each situation will make all the difference in your decisions.

An essential test of your role and your ability to be your best is this:

Do you really want to be your best in this role?

If so, keep digging, keep trying things that test your role, keep tweaking until your role feels right. If not, then consider changing it, and soon.