articles

Empathy-Crying

When Does Empathy Really Open Doors and Minds?

A woman cries. The caption reads, "Dad's bone scan came back." My eyes well up, and my face contorts like hers. I feel her anguish even though this photograph and caption are all I know about … more

victim-and-offender

As Victim, as Offender, It’s Our Job to Change the Story

I wrote this article in direct response to your candid answers. Thank you. In my last tirade I yelled at the namby-pamby Advice Flingers-Around who praise the purity of "finding your purpose." … more

find-your-purpose-240

Find Your Purpose? I Say, F#@k Your Purpose.

Find your purpose! Follow your passion! Really? Fuck you! I'm sick of reading, hearing, and seeing that advice. It's not helpful. In fact it hurts. I have too many big important interests that … more

lots-of-helpers

Name the Roles Your Helpers Play and Make Your Requests Specific

"Ask and ye shall receive,"† is often quoted ironically when something bad comes from an off-hand wish. When requests are well crafted, however, you may find the saying quite a handy reminder. As Mick … more

Before-I-Die

Before I Die, I Want To…

Look into the unknown future and make a wish. It's one of the best ways I know to build a clear picture of what's really important to you. And having that picture helps you focus on the present. Every … more

gunslinger-thumb

I Know a Gunslinger, and You Can, Too.

Every time I talk to a new student about roles, I get all wound up and giddy about the richness of the world we get to inhabit. Humans are each so complex and deep. I'm not kidding. And yet I feel … more

lance-armstrong-hero-cheater

Lance Armstrong: Why I Cheated

  "Good ... [clears throat] Good morning. I'll get right to the point. "Yes, I cheated. "Yes, I lied about it. "I lied because you wouldn't like me if you knew I was cheating, and you … more

anne-sophie-reinhardt-counterweight

Meet this Heroine of Reinvention

"I was Nobody. When I was anorexic I did not know who I was. I had no identity. I was 10 years old, still, when I was in my mid-20's. I was a baby inside. Just a year ago I was a tiny mouse. I didn't … more

helped-helpful-hurtful

Get a Little Hard Core on Your Relationships

(Yes, the title soft pedals a gnarly approach to a big subject.) Your environments are major contributors to your energy, your happiness, and your ability to focus, and the people in them are … more

Farnoosh-Brock-10-Minutes

Stop Sucking Your Vitality

Early results from the Stop Sucking Survey† suggest that a few more basic Vitality habits could make a big difference to some of you, so today's article is about training your role as a Stoker, the … more